Thread: Joke Thread
View Single Post
Old 10-11-2007   #7
Simon Bentley
Forum Handle: Simon Bentley YR005
Associate Member
 
Simon Bentley YR005's Avatar
 
Vehicle: Vauxhall Combo
Responder No: YR005
Call Sign: 2E0HYR
Region: West Yorkshire
Location: Garforth
Posts: 2,000
Simon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to beholdSimon Bentley YR005 is a splendid one to behold
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -- Winston Churchill

**"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -- Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." -- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -- Groucho Marx

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." -- Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." -- Oscar Wilde

*"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... If you have one." -- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

*Churchill's response:
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one." -- Winston Churchill



"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." -- Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." -- John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -- Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -- Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." -- Paul Keating

"He had delusions of adequacy." -- Walter Kerr

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -- Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -- Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -- Oscar Wilde



Lady Astor once remarked to Winston Churchill at aDinner Party,

"Winston, if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee!"

Winston replied, "Madam if I were your husband I would drink it!"*
Simon Bentley YR005 is offline   Reply With Quote