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This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the seventies. Ronnie
Barker could say all this without a snigger
This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters.
Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard frubbing scloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling
shot. At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered. The sugly
isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and the
other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers;
they had fetty sweet and fetty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets to
go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go.
Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared.
Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She
turned a pumpkin and six mite whice into a hucking cuge farriage with
six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks. The gairy
fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnight otherwise, there would
be a cucking falamity. At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the
prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve. "Mist all
chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse
over ollocks, and losing her slass glipper.
The very next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door
and the sugly isters let him in. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her
leg and let off a fassive mart. 'Who's fust jarted?' asked the
prandsome hince. 'Blame that fugly ucker over there!" said Mary Hinge.
When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on
both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk.
Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a
knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge
halls and a hig bard on. He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and
it fitted pucking ferfectly. Rindercella and the prandsome hince were
married. The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and
Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny!
THE END.
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